Erev Chof Daled Teves

BS"D

4pm
leaving the shul, had just finished mincha
still with some foreign taste in my heart

walking down kingston, hear someone calling
my non hebrew name with a very good accent

bujare (not bad pronounciation...)

this kid named amos whom i met via some
very enthusiastic russian lady around the block.
kingston av has some very interesting stories

watsup? (didn't know if it was ok do do that)

but i kept walking and thank G-d my girl Rina
stops and walks with me, she likes my new haircut,
yeah i tell her it's very liberating

oh yeah my buddy amos

so he tells me he is in a jam and needs some
cash, he wil get some money later , but just
for now, he neeeds 20.

aha, 20.
whats with you? are you ok? are you learning?

he is depressed he tells me, he is going through
something, he doesn't know how to get out of it.

are you going to be allright i ask him?

yeah, yeah...

ok, i go to sunshine, pull out cash, i come out
he is acting all suspect, hand him the funds
and say - you dont have to give me back anything
just take care of yourself please.

do u think u can give me 40?

!!!!(oh something aint right, on hell no...)

that is all i have. goodbye.

7pm
empire grill- eating with my girl iris.
feeling nesaus.
what was it? too much coke? the meat?

we finish eating we were meant to go have
coffee and just hang out until rabbi
paltiel's shiur later on.

somehow i ended up in a therapy session with
some crown heights women.

i am sure its a lovely project.
but not for me.

they turn to me and ask me to introduce
myself and say something positive that
happened to me today.

so i tell them, the brocha is that i came
back to yiddishkeit.
that i became free.

great.

then it started to become weird.

my stomack was turning, oh, i guess that food
stuff isn't agreeing. so i get up - politely that is
in the middle of the session and bounced.

walking home
red light
crown street
busy corner somehow
oh yeah the vort
and the bar mitzva

and amos?
he's talking to someone in the car
he sees me, it looks like he wants to come to me
i turned my head away, ignoring him
he walks away

(oh this kid better not be behind me..)

reach my house
phone rings
my lovely rabbi
and the poem goes::

batya, who is this kid u give money too?
uhm, what? you are next to whom?

no, who is this guy you gave money to - and you
dont even ask me first?
and now again he was with you on crown?

with me again? oh hold up rabbi man-
first of all, i know him from around here for
a year now, he never asked me for anything
he would tell me how low his life was
and how he was bored. never asked for a dime.
this time he did, and i though he was mamash low
so i gave him.

how much?

20.

listen to me batya. stay away from these boys
they are dangerous, they are low lives, they
want to milk ppl for cash, they re no good.
stay away.

fine. thanks for caring rabbi, dont you
worry i aint giving him a thing. not again.
since u know everything mr.satelite system rabbi
tell me whose lchaim is tonight?

nu? it was not meant to me batya. how old is he again?

lucky for my rabbi he was talking to me over the phone.

9pm
walking to the shiur carrying my hatzala chocolate box
(long story you don't want to know)

midnight
encounter on crown - with the familiar
with the mazal tov post below

and...

amos?
na...

-------
there is a well know teaching in chassidus that
says that the Ribonno Shel Olam brings words and
episodes to our attention, that we should derive
a lesson from. dont know what the hora'ah from this
is, (oh you mean why i gave him money to begin with?)
they tell us we are meant to live with the times
hm, let's see what the parasha is telling me.